Prayer

I once had a very wise spiritual director who said to me about himself, “The most necessary thing in my life is sleep; the most important thing in my life is prayer.”  I am sure many of us would agree with his first statement about sleep.  It would be good if we also agreed with his second about prayer.  Prayer was the most important thing in his life because the most important relationship in his life was his relationship with God.

Prayer is an expression of our relationship with God; prayer helps us to grow in our relationship with God.  But who is the God whose friendship and help we experience in prayer?  Jesus calls him Father; in fact he calls him Abba which means daddy!  To call God Abba Father means that God is not someone who is remote and distant from us, someone who is uninvolved and uninterested in our lives.  On the contrary, the God of Jesus is a God who knows each of us personally, who loves us unconditionally and who cares for us faithfully.  The Abba of Jesus is a Father who wants what is best for us as parents want what is best for their children.

So how should we pray to this God who loves us to bits?  Jesus is clear that we should use simple, honest words when we talk to God.  There is no need to babble, to use many complicated words.  The best words are those that come from our hearts.  The best words are those that are an honest expression of what is in our hearts.  What Jesus is asking us to do is talk to God as if we were talking to our best friend.

Jesus is also clear that we should ask God for what it is we need and to keep on asking.  Jesus insists that we persevere in prayer.  Our prayer must be persistent. Jesus assures us that God does answer our prayers of petition, but we must remember that when God answers our prayers he does so in a way that is best for us.  God sees the overall picture of our lives whereas usually we only see the immediate, present really.  When God answers our prayers God has our true good, our lasting good at heart. 

It is important that we do not get discouraged if we do not get from God what we ask for.  What we ask for may not be what we truly need at the time.  Our prayers are never wasted on God.  After all, God is our Father.

Claiming our Belovedness

Some years ago a woman by the name of Teresa came to talk to me about her experience of God.  She was carrying negative images of God.  For her, God was distant and demanding.  He was like a policeman watching to catch her doing something wrong.  He was also like a judge handing out sentences from on high.  Needless to say Teresa was frightened of God and because of this she was finding it difficult to pray.

After listening to Teresa I asked her if she would be willing to try a new way of praying.  I suggested that she spend ten minutes each day picturing in her mind what happened at the Baptism of Jesus. I invited her to do two things.  Firstly, to imagine what it was like for Jesus to hear God the Father say to him, “You are my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased.”  Secondly, to imagine that God the Father is saying the very same words to her, “Teresa, you are my beloved daughter in whom I am well pleased.”  I asked her to notice what she was feeling as she heard God the Father telling her that he was pleased with her.

Three weeks later, Teresa came back to tell me how she was getting on.  She said she was beginning to experience God differently.  God was becoming easier to relate to.  Rather than feeling that God was disappointed with her, she was beginning to feel that God was, in fact, pleased with her. Indeed, she was starting to accept that God knew her personally and that he was involved in her life.

The baptism of Jesus took place when he was an adult and it was a very significant event in his life.  During his baptism Jesus had an overwhelming experience of unconditional love.  He knew he was God’s beloved Son.  He also knew that his Father took delight in him.  What happened to Jesus at his baptism also happened to us at our baptism even though we were children and unaware of it.  As our parents held us over the baptismal font, God the Father said to each of us, “You are my beloved in whom I am well pleased.”  Unfortunately, because of life’s negative experiences this is a truth many of us find difficult to accept.  Instead of believing in a loving and affirming God, we find ourselves believing in a demanding and judgemental God.  Like Teresa, we need to find a way of getting rid of our negative images of God and of taking possession of the real relationship, the loving relationship, which God has with each of us. We need to find a way of claiming our belovedness.  Perhaps a prayer exercise like the one Teresa was willing to try can help us.

Prayer for the New Year

Jesus,
You became one of us and one with us.
You know what it means to be fully human.
Be my companion on my journey through life.
Walk with me at all times,
in days that are happy and in days that are sad.
Support me when I feel lonely.
Strengthen me when I feel fear.
Comfort me when I feel anxious.
Help me to let go of the things that do not matter.
Give me the generosity to live like you
and the courage to die like you,
trusting always in the care and protection of your Father.
Amen.



My Surrender Prayer

Abba God,
I welcome everything that comes to me today.
I welcome all persons and situations, thoughts and feelings.
I let go of my need to accumulate.
I let go of my need to be busy.
I let go of my need for approval.
I let go of my need to feel important.
I let go of my need to be in control.
I let go of my need to change others.

Abba God,
I accept your unconditional love.
Help me to recognise your presence in my life.  Amen.

Sacred Spaces

It is good for us to remember the place sacred spaces have in our lives.  It was in a sacred space that we were welcomed into the Christian community at baptism.  It was in a sacred space that we received our first communion, made our first confession, were confirmed and perhaps married or ordained.  And it will be from a sacred space that we will be entrusted to God’s other world beyond the grave when we die.

Every Christian community needs a sacred space in which to gather for worship and fellowship.  This sacred space we usually call a church.  But in calling our sacred spaces churches it is important to realise that a church is not, in fact, a building but a faith community, a community who believe that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life.

To develop a relationship with God it is not enough to gather in a church once a week with other Christians.  We also need to build a practice of personal prayer into our lives.  If our faith communities need sacred spaces to pray, so does each individual.  John Fullenbach once said, “We cannot pray all of the time everywhere, but we must pray some of the time somewhere.” To pray sometime somewhere it is really helpful to have our own sacred space. 

A sacred space is a place apart, a place free from distraction and from noise. A sacred place can be anywhere because God is everywhere.  It can be in a corner of your bedroom or your living room.  It can be in your conservatory or in your attic. The important thing is that it is accessible and easy to get to.  In your sacred place it is helpful to have a chair that is firm but comfortable.  It is also good to have a symbol or symbols of the presence of God.  These may be a lighted candle or an open bible or a picture or an icon.  A sacred space is your place.  It is your place to be alone.  A sacred space is important because the right kind of environment and atmosphere are important if we are going to spend time in personal prayer.

The gospels tell us that Jesus regularly went off by himself usually in the early morning to a lonely place to pray.  Here it is helpful not to misunderstand the word lonely.  It simply means a place of silence and solitude.  Jesus had his sacred spaces which allowed him spend time in intimate sharing with the one he called Abba. If sacred spaces helped Jesus to pray, they will certainly help us too.

A Sacred Time

The period between the Ascension and Pentecost is a very sacred time.  It is the period of the first novena, nine days of prayer.  Between the Ascension and Pentecost the disciples of Jesus kept vigil, they watched and waited for the gift from above.  Conscious of their need for divine help and inspiration, the disciples prayed earnestly for the gift Jesus promised them, the gift of the Holy Spirit.  The scriptures tell us that they “joined in continuous prayer, together with several women including Mary the mother of Jesus” (Acts 1:14). 

The days leading up to Pentecost offer us an ideal opportunity to pray for a fresh outpouring of the Holy Spirit in our personal lives and in the life of the Christian community. The energy and enthusiasm required to live the Christian life comes from the Holy Spirit; so does the wisdom we need to make good decisions. The world today needs Christians who have listened to the promptings of the Holy Spirit and who are willing to practice the values of Jesus with conviction and courage.

The sacred days leading up to Pentecost are also an ideal time to bring into the divine presence our needs and our intentions.  We all have things we are struggling with, things that are difficult and perhaps painful to deal with.  Even though we have a tendency to rely on our own power and strength to overcome our problems we do not have to manage these on our own.  The Holy Spirit is waiting for our invitation.  The Holy Spirit wants to help us.  The Holy Spirit can do for us what we cannot do for ourselves.

It is becoming more and more obvious that the Church is undergoing a major transition. Old models of faith practice which we held dear are breaking down leaving many of us feeling confused and lost.  While it is necessary to grieve for the things we are losing, it is also important to believe that this time of transition offers us wonderful new opportunities.  The Holy Spirit is with us as our guide and inspiration.  The sacred days between Ascension and Pentecost are a special time to ask the Holy Spirit to help us find a new direction for the Church, new ways of being community and new sources of nourishment for our spiritual lives.        

Come Holy Spirit. Inspire our minds with your wisdom. Fill our hearts with your love. Help us to believe that you are always with us, guiding us, helping us and uniting us. Amen.

Lent: Prayer

It is no secret that the religion of Jesus can be summed up in the word love.  But Jesus is no dreamer.  He knows that the reality of evil and the wounds we carry can make it difficult for us to love.  For this reason the main thrust of his teaching is focused on what it is that creates a loving heart.  Right in the middle of his Sermon on the Mount Jesus mentions three things which could be described as a practical programme to help us grow in love.  These are the three things the Christian Churches invite its members to practise in earnest each year during the season of Lent.  They could be described as the non-negotiable essentials of the Christian religion.  They are prayer, almsgiving and fasting.  Significantly they are three of the five pillars of Islam. 

Jesus’ teaching about God is clear and simple. “Say this when you pray, Our Father in heaven” (Matt 6:9). “You must call no one on earth your father, since you have only one Father and he is in heaven” (Matt 23:9). “Your heavenly Father knows all that you need.  Set your hearts on his kingdom first and all these other things will be given you as well” (Matt 6:32-33).  Jesus teaches that God is our Father whom we can call Abba.  Jesus’ Abba is in relationship with each of us.  He knows each of us personally and loves each of us unconditionally.  Abba is looking after us and providing for our needs. 

If the God of Jesus is called Abba then prayer is spending time with God who is a tender and affectionate Father.  “When you pray, go to your private room, close the door, and pray to your Father who is in that secret place” (Matt 6:6).  What a beautiful and accessible description of the activity of prayer!  Spend time on your own with your Father. During this time thank him for his presence in your life and for looking after you.  Talk to him in a personal way about what is happening in your life.  Ask him for the things you need, especially the things you need to help you develop a loving heart.  And, perhaps most importantly of all, hear him tell you that he loves you unconditionally, as you are.  For Jesus prayer is nothing more and nothing less than our personal act of surrender to the Father; to the Father’s love, to his care and to his help.  It is an act of surrender we need to make every day.

A Compassionate King

If there was one prayer you were given the option to make what would that prayer be?  For some people the prayer they would choose is that of the man known as the Good Thief as he hung on the cross next to Jesus on Good Friday,  “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”

That short prayer, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom” is both powerful and beautiful.  It is a prayer that is inside each and every one of us.  It is a prayer that is deep in our hearts.  Perhaps this is the reason why some people are not able to express it until the twelfth hour of their lives.  “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom,” is a simple and honest request to Jesus not to forget me, not to neglect me, not to overlook me, not to exclude me, but to grant me a place, any place, in his kingdom.

Why is this prayer made to Jesus?  Because Jesus is King of the eternal kingdom which we desire to belong to. Jesus is the one who rules over us.  He is the one whom God the Father has appointed judge of the living and the dead.  He is the one to whom we will give an account of ourselves when we die.  This is why on the last Sunday of the annual church year the Christian community celebrates the feast of Christ the King.

But what kind of judge will Jesus be?  We get some idea from his response to the request of the Good Thief: “Indeed I promise you, today you will be with me in paradise.”  These are not the words of someone who is critical and judgemental.  They are the words of someone who is compassionate and forgiving.  Jesus wants us to be with him in his kingdom.  Indeed, he will do everything he can to make sure that we will be with him in his kingdom.  This is why the poet Francis Thompson described him as the Hound of Heaven.

When we are able to pray the words, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom” with conviction, we can be confident that Jesus, our King, will respond to us in the same way he responded to the Good Thief on the cross, “Indeed I promise you, today you will be with me in paradise.”

Jesus, remember the broken hearted when you come into your kingdom.
Jesus, remember the hard hearted when you come into your kingdom.
Jesus, remember the weak hearted when you come into your kingdom.
Jesus, remember the down hearted when you come into your kingdom.
Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom. Amen.

Prayer

I once had a very wise spiritual director who said to me about himself, “The most necessary thing in my life is sleep; the most important thing in my life is prayer.”  I am sure many of us would agree with his first statement about sleep.  It would be good if we also agreed with his second about prayer.  Prayer was the most important thing in his life because the most important relationship in his life was his relationship with God.

Prayer is an expression of our relationship with God; prayer helps us to grow in our relationship with God.  But who is the God whose friendship and help we experience in prayer?  Jesus calls him Father; in fact he calls him Abba which means daddy!  To call God Abba Father means that God is not someone who is remote and distant from us, someone who is uninvolved and uninterested in our lives.  On the contrary, the God of Jesus is a God who knows each of us personally, who loves us unconditionally and who cares for us faithfully.  The Abba of Jesus is a Father who wants what is best for us as parents want what is best for their children.

So how should we pray to this God who loves us to bits?  Jesus is clear that we should use simple, honest words when we talk to God.  There is no need to babble, to use many complicated words.  The best words are those that come from our hearts.  The best words are those that are an honest expression of what is in our hearts.  What Jesus is asking us to do is talk to God as if we were talking to our best friend.

Jesus is also clear that we should ask God for what it is we need and to keep on asking.  Jesus insists that we persevere in prayer.  Our prayer must be persistent. Jesus assures us that God does answer our prayers of petition, but we must remember that when God answers our prayers he does so in a way that is best for us.  God sees the overall picture of our lives whereas usually we only see the immediate, present really.  When God answers our prayers God has our true good, our lasting good at heart.  It is important that we do not get discouraged if we do not get from God what we ask for.  What we ask for may not be what we truly need at the time.  Our prayers are never wasted on God.  After all God is our Father.

Back to Eden

The Garden of Eden is a symbol of life the way God intended it to be.  In the Garden of Eden Adam and Eve knew who they were in God.  They were aware of their belovedness which was their original blessing.  Their belovedness was enough in the Garden of Eden.  They did not need anything else.  This is why they were content in Eden, in harmony with God, themselves, one another and nature.

When Adam and Eve refused to accept their status as God’s beloved creation they expelled themselves from the Garden of Eden.  This led to the development of the false self.  The false self came into existence after the fall.  It was created when the original blessing of Adam and Eve was contaminated by original sin.  The false self is Adam and Eve trying to survive outside the Garden.  And very quickly they discover that they can’t!  When Adam and Eve put themselves outside the garden they lost the experience of their belovedness, their original blessing.  Their original blessing created their true selves; their original sin created their false selves.

Like Adam and Eve we too struggle to survive outside the Garden of Eden.  Our false self has us look for happiness in the wrong places, the wrong things and the wrong relationships.  Because of the false self we overly invest in accumulation, achievement and the need for approval.  This investment is the main reason why many of us end up exhausted, dissatisfied and with a battered self-esteem.  If we have any hope of finding some of the harmony which existed in the Garden of Eden we need to claim our belovedness, our original blessing.

Claiming our belovedness involves the acceptance of unconditional love.  We need to find a way of accepting the truth that we are loved and lovable as we are.  Accepting the truth that we are loved and lovable as we are, leads to deeper self-acceptance and a release from the pressure to accumulate, achieve and be attractive.

More and more people are turning to some form of contemplative practice to help them claim their belovedness. Contemplative practice is a form of prayer that allows us to receive, to be, to let ourselves be loved, to accept the gift that has already been given to us.  It requires us to make some time for silence.  In silence we are able to hear the still small voice within us.  This voice assures us that we belong to God and that God is pleased with us as we are.  This is why silence can be a homecoming to our own deepest belonging. It certainly helps to bring us back to the Garden of Eden!